Some days are truly harder than others. Some days I am totally filled to the brim with joy, and so no amount of missing my family can take away from that….however, there are other days when the missing becomes so great that it completely overwhelms me.
Thanks to technology, staying in touch is a snap, right? Sorta…Facebook is an excellent tool for a missionary. It allows me to be able to stay connected in a way that wasn’t possible five years ago. It allows me to stay up to date with all the inner workings of my family and friends…at least those who post those inner workings on their Facebook. Yet, sometimes it has the opposite effect. Sometimes, instead of bringing me closer to those I had to leave behind it can cause pain for what I feel I’m missing out on.
I’m struggling today with realizing that time doesn’t stand still just because I’m away. In some way I think I wanted it to…but that cannot be. Life goes on. Things happen, and so does my life. My life is happening. It’s not on hold. It’s happening.
The telephone…awesome invention, but after talking to my mom for an hour, which was awesome, it just left me feeling hollow after hanging up.
I’m thankful for the ways in which I can remain close to those I love, but some days it’s just harder than others to not throw a pity party for myself. Today just happens to be one of those days.
But I must remind myself that following Christ is not about having a good day every day because of the circumstances…it’s about completely dying to myself so that I can follow my Savior down the path of righteousness. It’s about laying it all at His feet because He has called me to do so. He didn’t want to hang on the cross, and suffer all that He did to take on the sins of the world….MY sins! No. He begged the Father for another way…yet, the path had been made..and so He bore the weight. He was called…so why wouldn’t I be called? He sacrificed…so why wouldn’t I sacrifice? Is the servant greater than the master?